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team communication

The Dollar Bill

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A few years ago, I was called in to take over a project that was in trouble: the Project Manager left suddenly and there had been no direct leadership for over a month.

In my first walk around the project area, I noticed a dollar bill thumb-tacked to a wall. I was curious but had other priorities so didn’t comment on this odd sight.

Weeks went by with the typical flurry of ramp-up activity: Who is responsible for each area, what are the requirements, how are we tracking them, where are the gaps, etc. When I stopped to catch my breath, I remembered the dollar bill, so I asked about it.

“Oh, that,” I was told. “The old PM said it was our project bonus.”

WHAT?!

I was horrified.

What the devil was their PM thinking? How did he expect the team to stay motivated with a symbol of negativity in their face day after day?

Apparently, the PM was trying to make a joke.

It was not funny.

The fact is, the team was extremely de-motivated when I got there. They felt unappreciated, stressed, and a bit hopeless in the face of all they needed to do.

I think of that dollar bill not as a self-fulfilling prophecy, but as a perfect representation of how that PM ran the project. His negativity made a difficult project that much worse. He let the team know he thought management saw them all as unimportant and unworthy.

And it took me months to turn things back around.

What that PM failed to understand is that people respond to our attitude and actions more than our words. If we want respect, we need to treat our people with respect. If we want the team to give 100%, we don’t simply tell them; we give 100% ourselves (if not more).

Just because we are in a tough situation doesn’t mean we need to infect the whole project. Difficulties happen all the time: We’re being pressured from the top, or there’s a really tricky issue we haven’t resolved. Maybe we’ve missed a milestone or something’s happened at home that takes us off our stride. While we shouldn’t pretend the world is made of cotton candy, it’s important to find the positive and use that to keep the team motivated.

And there is always something positive, even if we need to hunt for it.

Bottom line, a project team is made up of people. Human beings who are smart, creative, and want to do their best. Our job is to help them get to the goal line. We are here to remove barriers, not to be the barrier!

I took down that dollar bill as soon as I found out why it was there. And I let the team know how I felt about the old PM’s “joke.”

At the time, they may have thought my reaction was a bit over-the-top. But as the project progressed and we gained momentum, the mood improved and it wasn’t such a bad place to be anymore. The project continued to have its challenges, but it wasn’t due to a poor atmosphere.

As for the team’s project bonus? Let’s just say it’s too bad that old PM quit when he did.

January Holiday Card Review is More Than Tradition

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Every January I take time to re-read the Christmas cards I received from friends and family. It’s so busy in December that it can feel like opening cards is just another to-do on my already long list. But once the holidays are over and winter settles in, I make a cup of tea, curl up on my sofa, and go through the cards at a more leisurely pace.

What I love most about my January tradition is noticing the little details in each card; more than how old the kids are or if someone changed addresses, but “I wonder what they loved most about their time in San Diego?” and “wow, he looks more and more like his dad every year!”

Some of my favorite cards are the ones with personal notes and family letters. We have one friend who sends a picture of himself and his wife…and their latest bunny. I always look forward to seeing that one!

Each holiday card is unique and reflects the personality of the sender.

Each card is special because it shows the sender’s unique personality and how they approach the holidays.

Have you noticed how wide the variety is in the cards? Sparkles, stickers, photos, drawings, and cartoons. Card stock, photo paper, flat, folded…it’s incredible. I always wonder: why did they select this particular card? What did they like so much about it? “Because they were on sale” doesn’t tell the whole story – there was more than one design in the sale rack. They chose that card.

Even doing the same task, individuality comes through. Each person approaches buying, preparing, and sending holiday cards from a completely different angle.

So—how about your team, your executives, and your end users?

You’ve heard that when you gather ten people in a room they come out with eleven different opinions. This shouldn’t be a surprise. But have you ever thought about why?

Everyone at work is influenced by their position and department, the corporate culture, how their week is going, and their enjoyment of the task at hand. They’re also impacted daily by how they slept the night before, the weather, the traffic, the day of the week, their personal relationships, and past experience.

I could go on, but the point is this: it’s nearly impossible for two people on the same team to have identical views on anything.

How do you get anything done without resorting to draconian tactics?

Project management fundamentals will bring you a long way: a clear goal, scope, timeline, RACI, etc. Your colleagues will follow clear guidance because they want to succeed at this project!

No PM loves running a project where their people follow orders with no enthusiasm. It doesn’t just feel flat but in fact limits your project’s ability to succeed. Why is this? Because enthusiasm means there is hope and confidence. These, in turn, mean your team will bring their best game to the project, including out-of-the-box problem solving.

As the Project Manager, you can foster enthusiasm by paying attention to the people on your team (core, executive, extended) by meeting them where they actually are, not where you’d like them to be.

You’re probably not be able to curl up on the couch and spend an afternoon think about each person’s motivation. But you can pay attention to how they talk about a task in your next meeting and their approach to a particular issue. You can notice their relationships with other team members and whether they’re perpetually late (or early).

Even if you’re not in the same room, how does your team member (let’s call him John) seem today on Zoom? Is John quieter than usual or is his camera off? Does he seem particularly frustrated with a topic or does his comments have more of a bite to them this week?

Consider what might be going on in John’s head. He may have pressure from other projects (or perhaps it’s year-end close…or annual budget time and he’s under the gun). Maybe he has an issue that he hasn’t figured out how to handle yet and it’s putting him off his game. Take a closer look at John’s calendar the next time you schedule a meeting. Is his calendar a sea of blue?

Knowledge is power. If we understand, we can help.

One final thought. No matter what we’ve learned about John’s unique attitude and motivation, we have to remember that every person’s opinion and approach is valid. Our role is to pay attention and remove barriers so the whole team can move forward, not just John.

It’s not always easy to keep a group of people moving forward in synch, but a little extra effort to understand each team member will give you the insight you need to keep your team members motivated, and that makes success a whole lot easier to achieve.

Include Your Whole Value Chain from the Start

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We need to gather input from the teams down the length of the entire value chain.

As an IT/IS project manager, I am often involved in the selection of business software. The RFP is a key component of any large purchase, as it allows us to compare several systems against a set of common requirements, including business, technical, cost, and support.

But it doesn’t go far enough.

It’s easy to focus on marketing, finance, and the end user requirements. But what about infrastructure, manufacturing, or field technicians? How about quality control or customer service? We need to gather input from the teams down the length of the entire value chain.

I’ve been in situations where two systems look great: functionality, front end, and cost all are where we need them to be. Vendors, of course, talk a good game. Their RFP responses look similar. On the surface they’re both shiny new sportscars with all the latest gadgets.

But then the technical folks get in there and check under the hood. They find one still has an engine circa 1980! There’s no way this will work in your organization. You don’t have the resources to maintain the servers or update the desktop-based application. And it makes no sense to revert your users to 32-bit!

Good thing you included the tech folks before you signed the contract.

But not all projects involve software.

Years ago, our company was struggling because our manufacturing costs were consistently high. A review of our new product development process revealed that the problem wasn’t our product, and it wasn’t the skill of our manufacturing team. It was the NPD process itself.

R&D would design a product, test it in their small, flexible lab, and hand it over as a defined product. They weren’t aware of the constraints of large-scale manufacturing. No one asked them how long it would take to change over a line.

Manufacturing was not involved in the process until the very end. They had no input! The result was a product that worked as designed but could have been made at half the cost if only someone had checked with them first.

In the software example, it is wise to plan for a technical deep dive with the vendor finalists. We don’t want to bring them in too early, before we’ve finished analysis on other areas. But adding this tech review as a normal part of our software selection process can eliminate years of headaches for end users, IT, and you!

For product development, we want to make sure all areas of the value chain are involved in the NPD process. That doesn’t mean Support has equal say in the design as R&D, of course, but reviewing early and keeping them in the loop can keep you from launching a product that’s unsupportable.

All projects rely on communication through the whole value chain, at each phase of a project. Pull in the experts when it makes sense and plan to make adjustments. Reach out to teams you don’t traditionally include. And be prepared for a better outcome!

Three Truths About Praise

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There are three truths of workplace praise. And all have their roots in communication style and human behavior.

The topic of workplace feedback is wide and deep. Maybe I will write a book about it someday, but to keep this article a reasonable length, I’m going to focus exclusively on praise.

There are three truths about praise:

  • Not many people take the direct path and say, “Good job.”
  • Most people are oblivious.
  • Not everyone likes to be praised.

Let’s look at each of these in more detail.

The Indirect Path

I was working with a client a while back who felt disconcerted because his manager never said, “Thank you.” He thought he was doing a good job at work, but never received direct positive feedback. When we took a closer look at the situation, the proof his manager valued him was right there all along.

Here are some clues that your manager is pleased with the job you’re doing:

  • You’re invited to meetings. Most people are so busy they think of another meeting as a punishment. But consider: Who else is at the meeting? Is it a topic that expands your current role? Will being involved create opportunities down the road or make your current job a bit easier? Most often, the invitation is a gesture of growing trust or belief in your abilities.
  • You’re called upon to present…again. Like attending more meetings, many people don’t enjoy presenting. But if you did a bad job the first time, your manager would hesitate to put you in front of an audience a second time. It’s actually a compliment to be asked to lead a meeting and share your knowledge.
  • Your manager stops attending your meetings or no longer wants to be copied on every communication. This isn’t a sign that they don’t care, but that they trust the work you’re doing. Just remember they expect you to keep them updated on the project’s progress, and to let them know if you need them to help resolve an issue.

Most People are Oblivious

Yes, it’s true. 😉

What seems like a monumental task to you, something you’re exceptionally proud of, your manager may never even mention. They’re not trying to ignore your good work. They just have a myriad of other things to do. (Hey, if they had time to do your work as well as their own, you wouldn’t have a job.)

A long time ago I had a friend who worked for a big supply company. He used to go in on the weekends when no one was around to inventory the warehouse, straighten the shelves, and basically do a ton of things that kept the place working efficiently during the week.

I’m sure you can guess what happened: his boss never noticed, and if he did, he didn’t say a word.

Don’t expect anyone to be focused on what you’re doing. Most managers expect you to do a good job—you were hired to do it, so just being competent won’t merit praise. There are no participation awards.

I gave my friend this advice and it is still relevant: either don’t do the extra work, or let your manager know the relevant outcome.

There was no reason for my friend to go in on his own time to clean the warehouse. He could do it, or assign someone to do it, during the workweek. If he wanted to show his initiative, he could have told his boss about a significant finding during his time the past weekend. Remember, fishing for compliments is unprofessional and will backfire. Better to focus on the outcome. And again, if there’s no benefit to the project or company, don’t do it.

If you have an “oblivious” manager, simply let them know a particular event or effort went well. Here are some tips to receive a positive reaction:

  • Keep your delivery in your normal communication style. You want your manager to focus on the event, not be distracted by your altered style.
  • Don’t tell them about every little thing; the big efforts won’t stand out.
  • Be consistent in your communication so sharing good news won’t come during a special meeting.

Not Everyone Likes to Be Praised

This may shock some people, while others will raise their hand and say, “Oh, yeah, right here!”

For those who can’t imagine anyone who doesn’t enjoy a good pat on the back (or bouquet of flowers), take a moment to think about your teams. You have many personalities and styles to manage every day. Your communication methods vary to make sure you reach everyone.

So if Brenda doesn’t speak during a meeting, or if Lonnie blathers on about everything he did last weekend, you will likely find they will receive praise very differently, too.

And there are more of these folks on our teams than we know. They usually just grin and bear it.

A few years ago, I worked with an amazing team lead. She was the lynchpin to success in her area. I wanted to let her know how much I appreciated her. But she told me that she hates (yes, hates) to be called out, even if it’s praise. And she didn’t just mean in the obvious, public way. Her name attached to a team thank-you email caused her discomfort.

For team members like this, balloons aren’t going to be well received. Here are some low-key ways that, if they accept anything, may work:

  • Reply to all their email / DMs. That’s it. Just do them the courtesy of acknowledging their communication.
  • Use their data. They want to contribute and to know they’re doing a good job. When you actually use their work product, they’ll feel valued.
  • Do something for the whole team, but not together. A team gathering is probably not going to fly. But something non-personal will be more appreciated, like letting people know that next Friday you want everyone to take off at noontime (if within your power).

At the end of the day, the most important part of praise is paying attention to the communication style of the person on the other end of the line. When you’re seeking validation, you may want direct feedback but receive indirect signs of trust. On the other hand, you may feel uncomfortable with a public shout-out, but your manager loves to hand out awards.

And when showing appreciation to a team member, the best outcome happens when you focus on their most receptive communication style, not your own.

There Really Is Such a Thing as Over-Communication

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Information Overload!
If we’re not careful, we can overwhelm our people with information!

There once was a fantastic manager whose performance critique from their boss consisted of only one word: brevity.

No, that manager wasn’t me. But it is a true story and certainly wouldn’t be a surprise to find on my annual review.

We all understand how critical it is to communicate with our stakeholders. We want our team to feel important and included, and to have all the information so they are empowered to make good decisions. Our sponsors and other executives should have the critical information at the right time. And our end users and extended team? Let them know what’s happening so they’re “with us” all the way.

But sometimes it’s hard to know when we’re going overboard.

Do any of these sound familiar?

  • A five-minute update can regularly take twenty-five.
  • A meeting that “shouldn’t take too long” goes the entire hour…plus a few minutes.
  • There are five main slides stuffed with content in your presentation…and fourteen back-up slides.
  • You put everything they need to know in your email…and get the most basic questions in response.

I am guilty of all of these. And I can name a dozen colleagues who do it, too.

So really, if we’re making sure we’re giving people all the information; how could there be any harm in it?

To answer that, let’s look again at the above cases:

  • If you say an update will take five minutes, not only is your audience expecting five minutes, they may have re-scheduled if they knew it was going to take longer. But they’re trapped in the middle of the conversation and need to see it through.
  • The same goes for a meeting. It’s hard to leave a meeting in the middle of a conversation. And if they do leave, they take with them a sense of frustration and unfinished business. And if you tell everyone the meeting will run short, they will be expecting some of their time back, even if it’s just five minutes to grab a water before their next meeting begins.
  • A jam-packed slide deck is deadly. Each slide should contain useful information, but ask yourself: do you want your team to spend time reading a slide or listening to you? And what is in those fourteen backup slides? If your audience needs the data, should it be in the main presentation?
  • Most emails don’t need a ton of background to evoke the intended response. It’s easy to miss the main point of a long, involved email.

Our teams (core, executive, extended) trust us to be respectful of their time and to deliver what we promise. In each of the above cases, we are wasting someone else’s time. More than that, we’re setting expectations and then not living up to them. But combine both—and do it repeatedly—then we’re starting to erode their trust.

How Do We Tell We’re Over-Communicating?

The result of over-communicating can be subtle. You’ll notice people start declining your meetings or aren’t available when you ping them for a quick update. They may stop reading your emails and instead send you a DM asking about the exact the subject you emailed them yesterday.

Let’s take a final look at our cases. A bit of review is usually all you need to dial it back to where it needs to be:

  • Take a few extra minutes to craft a more succinct message in email—or preparing for that five-minute update.
  • Unless there’s a very good reason for a meeting to run over, cut it off and make sure you do a better job estimating the time needed for each topic.
  • Check your slides for the 3-5 bullet rule. More information than that and your audience can’t absorb the information. Be critical in your review: does your overall point get lost because there’s so much context?
  • Read your email before you send it. If it requires a lot of explanation, maybe a phone call or meeting would be better—that way they can ask for additional information if they need it.

The focus on communicating the right amount of information helps you and your team get the job done. And it builds that foundation of trust so when you do find a meeting running over, they know it won’t become a pattern.

The Problem with Helicopter Leadership

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Do they really need the rescue?

I was listening to a podcast about children and anxiety. The host (a psychologist) said oftentimes parents tell their kids “Just do your best. If you are struggling with something, we’ll find someone to help you get better.”

She went on to say this is actually conflicting instruction. It tells the kids that sometimes their best won’t measure up and someone needs to swoop in to make sure they do better.

She gave the example of her nephew. He’s in the 4th grade. He was assigned an oral book presentation for class via Zoom.

His mom had two options:

  1. Option 1: Ask him about the book, set a schedule for first draft, final draft, and practice times in front of mom, make sure he goes to bed on time the night before and eat a good breakfast the day of the presentation. Afterwards, grill him on the details, how he could improve for next time, etc.
  2. Option 2: Be aware of the assignment. Ask how he’s feeling and if he needs anything. Listen if he wants to share – but don’t interrupt. Then, after the report, ask how it went and how he felt about it. Don’t worry about anything else – he’s only in 4th grade!

Option 1 sets up the child for anxiety and stress. Option 2 gives him a sense of accomplishment and encourages independence.

When Mom takes over in Option 1, it also teaches the child that he’s not good enough and someone else needs to be in charge. This is also known as “learned helplessness.”

My question for you today is this: when it comes to project leadership, what messages are you sending your team?

Are you listening, guiding, and letting your team learn so they’re more independent?

Or are you micro-managing – attending every sub-group meeting and telling them exactly what they should do so they don’t make a mistake?

We want our project to run smoothly and our team to succeed.

But it can be difficult to let go of the need for everything to be perfect. The truth is, our people won’t feel a sense of accomplishment, and they won’t be able to work without your guidance if they never do anything on their own.

How can we learn to let go?

When considering what to let your team work on without you, ask yourself these two fundamental questions:

  1. Is your team ready for this next level of independence?
  2. Is the risk low enough that failure won’t tank your project?

If the answer to these questions is “yes”, then let go of the reins.

If you have a good relationship with your team, they’ll ask you when they need help.

Be ready when their output isn’t perfect. Then be ready when the next item they take on is better!

Before you know it, your project team will be independent, strong, and successful.

And you can feel proud to have helped them get there.